Those of you who knew me well before I was deported from the United States know that I am a fervent advocate for the cause of journal-writing. I am quite certain that a good quarter of the weight in my suitcases as I return home will be pages and pages and pages of my life story. I thank my wonderful family for loving me enough to send me pretty little journals to write in, because I definitely did not bring enough paper. I am currently about to finish a journal which consists of a notebook I bought here in Perú, on which I pasted a great deal of my bus tickets as well as a McDonald's receipt in Spanish and some exotic candy wrappers.
Still disgustingly creative. Eeee. :)
I bought a journal before I left from the brand "Quotable Journals," similar to one gifted me by my awesome stepmom Heidi (represent!) a few years ago. It is white and square, and on the front is printed a quote that has become woven into my mission and my life.
"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly."
Sometimes, as people with the inclination to doubt, we feel enormous weight as good things seem to come to an end. In our limited mortal experience and perspective, it is difficult to know why certain things happen. It is even more difficult to not even desire to know why. Many times we may rationalize that we don't even have the faith sufficient to START having faith! How could God expect us to walk forward boldly and confidently into the great unknown, remembering full well all those times that the leap of faith we took was directly over the edge of a spiritual cliff? How could He expect us to strip ourselves of pride, walking blamelessbefore Him and being sufficiently humble at any given time to know that we qualify for His kingdom if we are so called there?
If we were a little more like Nephi, we would remember in whom we could have trusted - again and again and again, cliff after cliff, mountain after mountain, trial after trial after trial. And we WOULD have trusted. And, perhaps, we have indeed trusted and we have indeed been led through the wilderness of our deepest afflictions.
If God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, why would His arm cease to extend toward us even in the very hour that we think the world is over?
It is through every whirlwind and temptation that we are refined. As missionaries, our most spiritual experiences are almost always at the end of hard days and hard weeks. The miracles always come after the trial of our faith. And if we have faith like a little mustard seed, the Lord promises that we CAN receive those miracles.
Mosiah 15:7 explains to us how Jesus Christ was able to perform the miraculous act of the Atonement as He humbly allowed His mortal will to be swallowed up (in Spanish, absorbed) by the will of His Father. God knew what needed to be done, and it was the loving submission of His obedient Son which made God's divine purposes come to pass. Christ's mortal life - His world - was over. It did end. But because He trusted in His Father's plan, look what He became! We cannot even imagine the glory with which He will return to this earth!
Here is the point.
God has a plan.
If we trust Him, He will lead us, and we will fulfill His purposes among His children, and we will become perfect, even as He is, and even as His Son is. We will become the butterflies that we were always meant to be.
Don't let your true self fade away. Be who you are, who you REALLY are, and you will be made even more. The only thing you have to change are the mistakes you may have made, and that is infinitely possible through the Savior.
This week I saw many people return to their God (Isaiah 55:7) and remember who they are. It is possible! It is true!
I love you!
Sorry this wasn't funny! I actually am in a really happy mood but these things take brainpower.
Okay I really do love you!
Hermana Hewitt
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