We are gringas, raising eyebrows around the world.

Come, little children, and I will teach you about the many wonders of FEET.

Feet help us to walk! Feet help us to run! Feet help us to swim! Feet can be ticklish or feet can be stinky. Feet help us to stand tall and do our part. Feet are useful for doing lots of good, healthy things. But guess what else I have learned in my great amount of experience, children? Feet can also nearly break your missionary companion's collarbone and knock down broken bathroom doors when your missionary companion is stuck inside because the niña forgot to tell her the KNOB DIDN'T WORK.

Well, Hermana Moody's collarbone is still intact and I am no longer cowering in the corner of a smelly, baby blue-tiled bathroom without soap.

aaaaaaaaaaaanyway

We taught a lot of people about the Law of Chastity this week and it was beautiful. I really love teaching people about the commandments of God! Because as we learn about His laws for us, we are given the opportunity to change our lives and receive unimaginable blessings from our Heavenly Father. If you don't own a copy of Preach my Gospel, go buy one.

ALSO...

We have three MARVELOUS people to baptize next Saturday!

(Just a little note - I recently received an email caution from an LDS Missionary Moms email list I am part of that recommended that names of investigators and other types of identifying information should not be posted on missionary blogs for their protection and privacy.  Anyway... so I'm going to just use initials to identify people Lex is working with.  I hope that's ok with everyone.  :-)

L. is a miracle. He is the 21-year-old brother of some long-time inactives who recently we have begun to bring back to church, and one day he just up and decided he´d like to start doing what Heavenly Father wants him to do. He talked about the church to his member grandma, and she told the Elders, who told us that he apparently was asking to be baptized! So we met and started to teach him, and he really truly loves the gospel. I enjoy teaching him because he is so receptive and he asks questions and soaks it all up and keeps his commitments and likes church and is AWESOME.

We are also going to baptize N., a young mother of 2 toddlers who has decided it's about time she changes her life as well. She's phenomenal. She struggled to keep her commitments for some time and then recently we taught her about the Law of Chastity and it was like this huge epiphany that she really can repent and know that the Lord will forget all of her past sins. It has been a stunning experience to watch her grow and begin to really love the teachings of God.

Y. is the 15-year-old cousin of N. We have taught her on and off for several weeks and she progressed at the beginning, but then stopped just before her best friend, A., died a few weeks ago. We had taught A. and her family, all less actives in our ward, a few times and A.'s passing away was very sudden and very shocking. It has taken an serious blow on Y. and for awhile we had a difficult time reaching her. But this week Hermana Moody and I felt very strongly that we needed to try again to open Y.'s heart and invite her again to be baptized and start her life anew. We pleaded with the Lord for guidance in everything to do with our dear Y. and met with her several times, doing everything we could to help her recognize her answer. She prayed about Joseph Smith and about being baptized, and she said she knows it's true (she's also been sharing the gospel with several mutual friends of A. in recent weeks) but just wasn't sure if she was positive about being baptized so soon. We invited her to continue praying and we did the same, and after church yesterday we talked with her. We presented her the news that N. is going to be baptized on the 9th of November and immediately a light came to her eyes and she told us she would love to be baptized the same day. I know that the Lord is watching over us and guiding our work. If we hadn't decided to teach N. the Law of Chastity and invite her to be baptized on the exact day that we did, neither of them would have received the answers they needed and they wouldn't both be cheerfully preparing for their baptisms.

I feel my Savior's love.

There are only a few problems in my life right now.

1. Stressed about cambios. I really would like to be here for these baptisms with Hermana Moody. BUT we'll see what the Lord has in store.

2. Being eaten alive every night by something in our tiny room. My ankles look leprous and I have never been one to deal well with itching. BUT we are looking at a new house with the zone leaders today and if all goes well we will be moving into a much cleaner, more comfortable space very soon.

3. Everyone thinks I'm a big creep because I saw one of our zone leaders holding his companion's suit coat up to his face and then I (being the wildly intelligent and thoughtful individual that I am) took the coat from his hands and took a big whiff, ATTEMPTING to be funny and imitate what I saw him doing.

Problem? He, being Peruvian and confused about gringo humor in general, didn't understand my joke AT ALL and right in that moment, Hermana Moody turned around to see me sniffing the zone leader's jacket and just stared at me as though she had caught me chewing on the ear of one of the street dogs.

AGH. BUT hey, at least I make some people laugh. 

4. Feeling like the Peruvian women are trying to kill me or ruin my chances of ever being beautiful again. See the picture of me with a clean plate... (Lex sent pictures this week, but they wouldn't load properly and couldn't be opened so they are not on this post.  :-( ) 

I had just finished a MOUNTAIN of arroz chaufa because the Elders told us that Hermana Aranda would cry if we didn't eat the three hundred pounds of food she gave us. Further evidence of this maldicion...

Our pensionist LITERALLY TOLD US THAT OUR FOOD WAS GOING TO KILL US.

She's one of the good friends who stabs from the front.

BUT it's all for the better. Look like a whale=get less whistles and cat calls in the street. 

Plenty of resolutions. Everybody's happy.

Quote of the Week:

"The dead are calling you!" - guy in church, trying desperately to animate the members to do baptisms in the temple.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

De Perú con amor,

Hermana Hewitt

Upstream Belugas 10-21-13

Well everybody, my companion found her true love this week. She declared to me in the security of our tiny room that she will be back living in Perú without a care in the world in about 15 months.

Yes, I am concerned as well.

Especially because the love of her life is some salted queso that she bought from our abuelito amigo who owns a tienda on the corner of our street.

I, too, came to a conclusion of the way I would like to spend the rest of my life one morning this week. I would really like to just study the scriptures and draw pictures forever. While I do indeed intend to feast from the scriptures that I have grown to love so incredibly much here on my mission, I feel like the idea of sitting and drawing pictures for a living could potentially deserve a 

hashtag broke.

But for right now, we are incredibly satisfied in doing the work of the Lord.

Speaking of which, I have something to say to you (and yes, I mean you). You should do three things this week:

1. Find a folleto de la Ley de Castidad (Law of Chastity), read it, and follow it completely. Your life will change.

2. Begin to read the Book of Mormon more fervently. Find reasons to love it even half as much as I do.

3. Do everything in your power to be exactly obedient to the commandments of God.

Presidente Archibald came to Puente Piedra on Thursday to interview every person in our zone. I didn't realize how much I needed his counsel until I got it and it was simply a gargantuan wave of understanding. He offered me as well as my companion advice on how we can tweak tiny parts of our teaching to maximize the Spirit and help our investigators to make and keep commitments leading them to the ordinances of baptism. 

Two of the most important things I learned from my mission president were that one) my calling is very, very, very serious. It isn't as though I have been lazy or disobedient or rebellious or immature, but perhaps it is that I have not completely taken to heart that each and every single person I teach has the opportunity to change his or her life in that very moment that I invite him or her to be baptized. President said to me that as I walk out the door of someone who chooses to not accept the gospel, I am leaving them in the exact same spot of spiritual progression in which they may stay for eternity. That, my dear friends, is weight. 

President also taught me a crucial aspect of missionary work. The statement that has stuck with me: "You HAVE to trust that the Holy Ghost WILL do His job." Because He absolutely will, without exception, if there is faith involved. But if I don't believe that the Holy Ghost is going to change someone's heart, what right have I to expect them to believe that He will?

Missionary work is the work of the saving of souls. It simply cannot be denied. I have only 19 years, but I know that what I am doing right now is the most important work in all of time and space. 

For all I say that is sincere and serious, I am still the beloved freckle-faced animal you all know probably just a little bit too well.

Proof?

See photo below. Les presentamos la hermana Hewitt, choking on her delicious Inka Cola.

Quotes of the Week (hay 3):

"We are like two belugas swimming up a stream filled with trout." - Hermana Moody, commenting on our traverse up a busy calle at night with tons of people going the opposite direction.

"I be putting on my Chapstick every morning. Gloss it up. My lips feel gorgeous." - Elder Avery

"Yeah, I have read a lot of Jane Watson. We had to read Pride and Prejudice in high school, and then I watched the movie, and...I fell in love." - Elder Scroggins

Lots of love!

Hermana Hewitt

The great search for Hermana Moody's pants 10-14-13

Alright, milhojas. First off, I am just going to tell you the truth. 

NO BAPTISM.

Yep, we cried.

Xiomara's parents decided to take her and her brother to live with them in Spain now. So I guessssss her dad might baptize her there. In any case, they called on Friday and said she isn't going to be baptized here. There was mucha tristeza en nuestra casa for a few minutes. And then Hermana Moody reminded me that there are no coincidences, and Heavenly Father knows what He is doing. He really, truly does. We said a prayer asking for comfort and the ability to keep working, and since that afternoon we have felt strengthened despite our afflictions. We got to take a picture with Xiomi at church yesterday and tonight we are going to visit their family here and have a little farewellish thing.

Let me tell you something.

We are currently teaching SIX DIFFERENT ADULTS who ALL want to be baptized but need to change their living situation first. These two Hermanas are praying our guts out for miracles to happen.

So, good things and less good things. But all will be consecrated for our benefit and that of others if we are faithful and obedient. 

I KNOW THIS.

Crazy things that happened this week:

-In two consecutive days we had two very awkward experiences with two different barrachos. 

NOBODY PANIC THEY DIDN'T TOUCH US THEY COULDN'T EVEN SEE STRAIGHT.

But they both wanted to hear about the word of God. And both times Hermana Moody said of course we could talk to them about our loving Heavenly Father...when they were sober and could actually understand what the heck was going on.

Well...those encounters both ended really anticlimatically. 

murmurmurmurhuh?qué?klañshei robnjdaf dsi tioh ijadkf jhewrigkadshbvañeritoea

Well okay señor talk to you later RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

-A young child ate a roll and drank some juice and continued to run around with his friends until moments later he pleasantly bent forward and rejected his stomach of the nourishment it was about to receive. All over the FRESHLY WASHED DIRT FLOOR AWWWW DARN IT

-We heard approximately seven stories about wacky dreams that people had here. Peruvians dream a lot, which is freaking awesome. The only problem is when they decide that they are having manifestations from angels every time they dream that their dog is writing in the clouds.

-OH HEY WE ARE IN A VIDEO THAT FIVE COUNTRIES ARE GOING TO WATCH SOON. Elder Alarcón of the Area Seventy came to our ward to film a consejo de barrio (ward council) for this whole amazing new Work of Salvation thing and interview us missionaries. So that's no big deal I guess. We asked if he was doing this in a lot of different places and he just looked at us blankly and was like...nope...only this ward...

#jefes

Our bishop told us that apparently our ward is progressing disgustingly fast, and Elder Alarcón wants to show everybody what that looks like. Welp, we'd better keep running.

-In the Sunday School lesson the teacher said we need to have power like buffalos. I'm going to be honest with you all right now.

I don't know what she was talking about.

-We met a hyperventilating cockeyed Shih Tzu named Baby Blue. We're just going to say it was the most gorgeous creature I have ever witnessed.

SURPRISE IT'S OPPOSITE DAY

-As we walked back to our house after a nice long day of lessons, we passed a father rocking his baby in his arms. Awe how sweet. Then we looked down at the curb to find his wife, holding out her toddler son sideways in the air like an over-sized, dirty pair of sneakers and encouraging him to continue PEEING IN THE STREET.

OH MY GOODNESS WHY.

People just do that stuff here. 

Sometimes we just can't believe Perú could get any less classy. But then it turns right around and DOES IT AGAIN.

-We, the missionaries of the Estaca Puente Piedra, put on a talent show to kill the beat. Some people sang, yours truly sang, some more people sang...just kidding we didn't ALL sing. But I did play the one song I have ever written for the guitar and that was alright. And Elder Crozier blew our minds with that business. And there was some Backstreet Boy action going on that we're not even going to discuss. All in all, it was absolutely excellent.

I will explain trifle NEXT WEEK.

Quote of the Week is of our companionship, trying to see if Ines was in her house when she didn't come out:

"Hey, did you know that this is frosted glass?

They must have made a mistake, cause..........

we can't see a dang thing."

Oh yeah, also, Hermana Moody lost some pants in our tiny room and for three days we were searching and couldn't find them. We thought someone was breaking in, and then...we found them in an inexplicably likely place. 

THE DRESSER

Love you all. Thanks for your prayers. Please be safe.

Best conference of my life!!! 10-7-13

If an individual ever had the ability to express his or her whole soul in an email,

I would probably trade him or her a bar of dark chocolate and an entire jar of peanut butter to find out the secret.

I really have found a change beginning to stir in my heart. I think the biggest sign is that I have this deep and profound desire to be obedient to not only every law and commandment given from Heavenly Father, but also the whisperings of the Holy Ghost in each moment of my day. I just really want to do what God wants me to do. That doesn't mean that I have talent for being obedient, but it means that I am laying down my weapons of war and actually trying to join sides with my Heavenly Father. To anybody who would like to lead a happier life, pray for the ability to be obedient. That is my best advice.

Also, if YOU did not get the chance to watch the 183rd Semi-Annual General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints this weekend, please make that happen.

 http://www.lds.org/general-conference/sessions/2013/10?cid=HPFR100413105&lang=eng  

If you don't think it's important, we have an emergency.

HERE IS THE SOLUTION

1. Go to lds.org.

2. Find the information for the nearest branch of the Church.

3. Figure out how to get in touch with the bishop.

4. Ask him how to get in touch with the missionaries.

5. Plead with the missionaries to come to your house and teach you about the Restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

6. Listen to what they have to say and then accept their invitation to pray in faith to your loving Father in Heaven and find out for yourself that we have a prophet on the earth today.

7. Well, the missionaries will help you with the rest.

It is really, really easy!

All the Lord has asked us to do is look to Him and live. Look to Him in every moment for help, guidance, strength, and knowledge. I promise you that He will help you if you have faith and you are sincere.

SHOULD PROBABLY LET Y'ALL KNOW

we have a baptism this week <3

AND WE ARE THRILLED.

Little Miss Xiomara, of nueve años, has inactive parents who live in Spain. We have been trying to get their permission to have her grandpa baptize her for several weeks now, but they just hadn't come to a decision.

Elder Scroggins suggested a district fast for all of our different struggles, and so we fastedon Thursday. In the middle of the day, we called Xiomi's wonderful aunt Merci and she said that her parents have given permission! So this adorable little lady is going to be baptizedthis Saturday.

(p.s. fasting works)

We also found out (YESTERDAY) that the stake has decided to put on a talent show (THAT NIGHT) and they want US (the missionaries) to come up with FIFTEEN DIFFERENT ACTS.

WHAT.

Wish us suerte.

Quote of the Week:

We were teaching Antonio about the Palabra de Sabiduría. He agreed to live it...poco a poco...and so we had to have a nice discussion about the blessings of immediate obedience and things como así. He then agreed to live it completely right then and there, then thought for a moment, and then pouted like a child and said,

"Pero...whiskey es rico."

OH YOU POOR THING WITHOUT YOUR TASTY WHISKEY.

He's going to have a good long life.

All the rest of the quotes are pretty much only funny if you're a missionary and know the passages about baptism in the Book of Mormon like the back of your hand. Although I always get a kick out of Elder Brown and the fact that his idea of the thug life is...surprise selfies with random people.

smile click click flash yay

Alright, we're late to go pay for our apartment. Somebody remind me to explain why the word TRIFLE is so darn hilarious en la zona Puente Piedra.

Love you all!

De Perú con amor,

Hermana Hewitt